Monday, November 14, 2011

Wait Upon the Lord

I was born into one of the Godliest families yet I had no clue what a true Christian was. All I know is, that as a small child I walked down the center aisle after a “fire and brimstone” message wanting simply to just not go to Hell. I had no idea what following Christ even meant. Fortunately, God never gave up on me. He pursued me- over and over again. I tried to fill His void with earthly things. NOTHING WORKED.

Then in 2007 God began chasing me. He was there in my dreams. He was there in my thoughts. He was there saying, “You may have walked that aisle, prayed that prayer, been baptized in my name. However, you aren’t my child. Come to me so we can have true fellowship forever.” I ran. I ran. I ran. I think I kept thinking I would always have more time. There were games I wanted to keep playing. The harder I ran from Him the harder He chased me down.

One cold night in February, I was working and received a call from my parents. Ric Mason, a father of a childhood friend and a friend of my father’s, was killed in an accident in Honduras. That night, I sat in a dark sanctuary with my Mom mourning Ric and another man who was also killed. I told my Mom, “I’m not sure if I am a Christian.” She said to me, “Figure it out.” And she walked out of the church leaving me there alone with God. In that dark sanctuary on that cold February night back in 2007 I met my Savior. He had been chasing me for a long time and when he finally got me still I couldn’t run any more. Halleluiah!!! He didn’t give up on me!

I did not have the turnaround in my life that I had thought I might. I was still caving in to my earthly ways all the time. In the fall of 2007, my future husband came walking in to my life. He was the first man I had ever dated to pray over me. I was in love. I knew he and I had been created for each other. Even with this blessing, I was still running. Brian was running. Together we were creating chaos. I think God knew to get our attention he was going to have to bring us to our knees. One year in to our marriage, we were faced with job loss and in the beginning of 2010 my husband lost his job.

During this journey, God has taking us through a valley. I have been on my knees and in His word. I have fallen in love with my Savior. I’m not perfect. I still sin ALL THE TIME. I still like to run but at the end of the day I know my peace comes from Him. We are in a waiting period right now on a job that could take us to the top of a mountain. Our walk through the valley would be over and God could begin using us in other ways.

This morning I was thinking about “waiting on the Lord” so I Googled the phrase. Isaiah 40:31 was the first verse in my search.

But those that hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

Was it a coincidence that this was the verse I came to first? No. This verse was read at my grandfather’s funeral, it is the verse that Harper is laying on in some of her newborn pictures. As we wait on news of this job, I have no idea if God has this in His plan or not but waiting on the Lord to answer our prayers has been one of the greatest journeys. I have fallen head over heels for Him and any time he wants to bring me to my knees He can. Anytime he wants to say “wait”, I’ll wait.

I am ready to soar like an Eagle when He is ready for me to fly.