Wednesday, June 20, 2012

9 Months!!!

This is every day- mouth wide open- laughing!

I haven't blogged about Harper in a while. I was doing a monthly post to celebrate those milestones but then honestly I felt like we hit a MAJOR wall. We had sort of stalled in development and I was just in denial. I didn't want to sit here and write about how I personally felt about the journey we were on. I hadn't yet wrapped my mind around everything. So I took a step back, focused inward, and hit my knees. I made a great deal of progress I feel like in the past three months although the past month has been the hardest.

In my opinion, early life with Ryan was so hard and I was beginning to think that life with Harper was going to be just as hard. Harper is delayed developmentally. Our pediatrician (whom I love) assures me at each appointment that there is nothing major wrong with her. She may just need some help learning the gross motor skills that she currently can't do. So, we've been referred to Babies Can't Wait. It's an early intervention program. If we qualify, then she will receive physical therapy. If she doesn't qualify for this program then we will reevaluate and possibly do private therapy.  

I think the hardest part of this was understanding God has a plan. My plan was that with Harper we would avoid all of the hard things I faced with Ryan. I planned no therapy, no delays, no problems.

I understand and appreciate now that just because Harper can't roll over from her back or she can't bear weight on her legs that she is perfect. She was created in the image of God and how can I doubt His creation. How can I doubt his trusting me to be her Momma? I can't. I won't.

It's frustrating for me because if I hear one more time from well meaning people how she will do this or that or how when they were watching her and she did this or that I will explode. My head will come clear off my shoulders! I love talking about Harper with friends who are talking to me in love. Those are conversations when I can let down the guard and just say how disappointing it is. Those are the times that I hear "she'll do it" and I actually believe it. But more than anything, I can just be me. I don't have defend my parenting style. I'm just heard. There are a handful of friends (5) who I can text or call in tears or joy and I hear at the other end of the line a friend's encouragement. I need that. But those who tell me over and over again to do this or that and I can feel the judgement, they possibly may get smacked down. Just sayin!

I think my mom said it best when she jokingly said, "Harper, we are going to have to take you to a Healer!" (I'm really surprised this didn't hurt my feelings but it made me LAUGH. And now when I'm discouraged I just think of that moment and LAUGH. Moms are good like that.)
So there's the hard stuff of where we are!

The good stuff is so good! I'm so in love with this bundle of joy! Her laugh is contagious. Her blue eyes dancing about all the time. I cannot believe that our girl is already 9 months old! Time flies when you are having fun and we are having a blast!
The past three months has been really just more of the same! Every day is great. I'm head over heels in love with my girl. Now that it's summer, I've got both kids at home and I can't explain how much Harper loves Ryan. It's precious really.  These past few weeks have been spent poolside! Harper loves to splash around in the pool!  Altogether, Harper hasn't really changed much!
What are your stats?
We had your 9 month well check, you weigh 21 pounds 11 ounces. No wonder my back is breaking all the time!

You are 29 3/4" long. WHOA!

Are in size 4 diapers.
You can say "da-da", "momma" (sometimes), and a lot of babbling.

Are in a size 2 shoe.

You are wearing 9 - 12 month clothes!

Eat 6 ounces every 4 hours during the day and solids two to three times a day. Generally you are eating food at breakfast and dinner. Dr. Young wants us to work slowly toward weaning to whole milk and a sippy cup.  
At night, you sleep in stretches varying from 10 hours to 12 hours straight.
Bedtime is 7 to 8.
At 6 months you couldn't sit up but you can now!!! Praise!

You can roll from your belly to back.

You like to be out and about with Mommy.
You really LOVE being outside.

You are a chatter box!
You love Barney, The Wiggles, and anything else musical! 
You have started drinking from a sippy cup.

You are a great eater but hate the green stuff!


Wow, how fast you've grown! Daddy and I are super proud of you! You are such a precious gift to us. I have been discouraged lately but I'm making a promise to you, myself and God to no longer be controlled by this massive urge to make you do something. I realize you will in God's time do all of the "big" things like crawl, roll, etc.

I'm enjoying being home with you and Ryan. Watching you two is the highlight of my day. I'm blessed!!! You are in love with Ryan.

I'm already planning your 1st birthday! I can't wait. We've got lots of partying to do and memories to make!

I love you!